Bespoke Your Mobile Phone

Have you ever stopped and taken the time to actually work out what you want from your mobile?  Is it performing as you would wish?  Does it hit your digital spot?  Or do you find it, as I did, an absolute nightmare, like an emotionally high maintenance toddler constantly wanting your attention or like a knackered, overworked, overloaded donkey feeling the sting of the whip on its flanks of its digital master? Well, I have had the time to stop and think and I now find that I am daydreaming about what my perfect mobile phone might look like - what features it should have, which features it shouldn’t - exactly how bespoke can I make it to incentivise me to pick one up again after my insightful year in the blissful digital wilderness.

My list of wants and don't wants for my mobile phone. As we are all unique so our mobiles should be too to reflect this, so I need to bespoke my perfect mobile accordingly:

IN MY IDEAL WORLD: WHAT I WANT FROM MY MOBILE PHONE:

To Make and Receive Calls for two-way live conversations.

Camera: In an ideal world I would like to be able to record those spontaneous moments. It is good to be able to share them via blue tooth - just image sharing (not texts).

Pen: I love being able to draw of images and noting down lists by hand - I love hand writing notes, it's fun and just so personal.

Taxi App: As I cannot rely on raising my arm on the street anymore.

Car Parking App: To make payment as parking meters are becoming rarer than Hens' teeth.

NOT WANTED FROM MY MOBILE PHONE:

Texting Facility. Seriously, I am not interested however funny and humorous some texts can be, I know I use to love to send some quick witted one-liners which I thought were hilarious, but as texts can't be filtered for amusingness as no amount of A.I. filtering could ever vet the messages to deem them unfunny or funny. I do not want to receive these sometimes seemingly coded missives, full of typos and bereft of punctuation, making them open to misinterpretation that end up playing on my mind and cheating my out of optimum head space.

Limited* Social Media: I have no intention of joining a tribe, I do not want to share my friends’ privacy with others, I have no inclination of becoming a digital net curtain twitcher. No shamebook either, who needs this time consuming voyeurism of posts from boastful photo shopped images of supposed perfection - I'm fine with my imperfections thanks and don't need unrealistic goal posts, I've never been bothered with keeping up with the Jones or even the Kardashian glam clan. Get real bu being real. Young people really do need to learn to discern what is and is not for them. *Twitter , for me, via my laptop, twice a week is my limit.

Emails: Not required as I have a computer for work and do not want to be contactable on holiday - everyone is entitled to periods of uninterrupted rest. I have my laptop for travelling so can keep up with the necessities. Sorted.

Alarm Clock: As I need to be woken up in my bedroom this is a no-brainer as I do not allow mobiles in the bedroom so there is no blue light confusing my brain.

Calculator: I'm quite capable of working out the maths of simple everyday things and if my mental arithmetic isn't quite up to it, I can scribble down some figures to reach the answer - it's good for me and keeps my brain agile - dementia can take a hike.

Whatsapp: Not even for the family, when travelling or on holiday. I find this the most toxic brain drain. It's my personal Bette Noir although, for others, I fully respect and understand how it is their hero product.

Snapchat: What type of psyche did this inventor have anyway? Some delinquent who realised the temptation of being able to get away with 'flashing' someone perhaps? It's sadly encouraged and opened up a whole world of sexting that our under-the-legal-age teenagers are ill equipped to deal with the emotional fallout from. Note to parents who are the bill payers and have their children's mobile contracts in their name - you are in fact 'enabling' your children by giving them the phone and so if they send sex texts you are breaking the law too. Be responsible in having those clear conversations with your youngsters to set the moral boundaries as so much has become normalised.

Google: The ultimate interrupter of the natural flow of conversation.

YouTube: I have this independently on my laptop and DAB mobile radio.

I am so happy to find out that I have come a long way in the year I have lived without a mobile phone as I am no longer that poor donkey, I have grown into a rather beautiful white horse galloping along the shoreline of a stress-free life with the wind in my care-free mane. I can hear the soundtrack to an early childhood television series start up in my head now, 'On white horses, snowy white horse, let them ride away!'  Can you relate to my mini fantasy or am I a stride away from losing my connection with real life? Well, whatever!  Although, I ask you this - do you feel that your life is a bitch or is life a beach - it's your viewpoint, your life, choice.

NOW TAKE 5 MINUTES TO WRITE YOUR SHOPPING LIST FOR YOUR IDEAL MOBILE PHONE - ultimately this will help you focus your attention and know what is in fact important to you.

A mobile can be many things to many people, but it only matters what it means to you and how you want it to fit into your daily life if you are not to become a hostage to it.

Once you have set out your priorities you can decide how best to progress: either by bespoking your smartphone or to perhaps consider a digital declutter by getting rid of some surplus to requirements apps or by downsizing to a dumbphone or be taking a digital detox to rebalance and refocus your mind - feel the benefits of your cortisol levels lowering. The only frightening part to any of this new way is the actual thought of going digitally commando, once you get over that you’ll be surprised at how liberating it can be.

WARNING: Never stop using your mobile phone without putting other communication plans in place first and telling others of your new or trail lifestyle choice.